Humor
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HALLOW YOURSELF TONIGHT!!
“You’re a girl,” the man replied. “You can’t take off your shirt. Those are the rules.” Reluctantly, I did put it back on but I was mad and not one bit embarrassed. Why did a man have more freedom than I did? And besides, the two of us looked exactly alike shirtless!! Read more
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YIKES! SKYPE!
Honestly, I really am trying to stay ‘with it’ in terms of technology…but I just keep hitting roadblocks. I finally purchased an Internet phone, but I don’t ever use it for email because the darn screen is too SMALL to read. I even connected it to the Bluetooth in my car but am too nervous… Read more
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IF YOU HATE IT……MAKE IT FUN!
He connected 8 leads from a little device and then hesitated. “Well, these last two have to go up under your left breast.” “No worries!” I laughed. “There’s nothing to go up under!” Read more
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FENG SHUI ME!
Our house is on the market. Having personally boxed up our homes for 19 moves in the last 35 years, I do not plan to pack one, single item that I don’t have to. In fact, the last two moving companies I’ve used have actually asked me if I want to work for them.… Read more
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THE VISIBLE WOMAN!
Back in the 70’s I purchased the “Visible Woman” for the girls in my high school English class. It was a see-thru plastic model of the human body. I figured that they should know what went where in their bodies. Little did I realize that 40 years later I would be proclaimed an INVISIBLE… Read more
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LIGHT MY FIRE
“Hey, you’re probably gonna get a ticket,” I said to the older gentleman sitting in the fire zone outside of Starbucks. “It’s okay,” he replied with a cursory glance at the sign. “My middle name is, ‘Fire’.” “Yeah, right,” I said, rolling my eyes. “My middle name is, “Ignatius,” he calmly explained, “which in Latin… Read more
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INCH BY INCH
For some stupid reason, when I turned 50, I decided that I should get an official physical. Not only had I lived half a century, I felt super-duper! The doctor poked everywhere, made me pee in a cup and sucked the marrow of my veins with waspy-looking hypodermics. The nurse measured and weighed me.… Read more
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GET ON MY LAWN!!!
Okay, so I called the cops—but hey it was late and dark and I was alone in the house when I spotted an old, beat up van with tinted windows parked well into the grass at the edge of my lawn. At first I thought it might be the girl who had contacted me… Read more
AGEFULLY AGING 