Back in the 70’s I purchased the “Visible Woman” for the girls in my high school English class. It was a see-thru plastic model of the human body. I figured that they should know what went where in their bodies. Little did I realize that 40 years later I would be proclaimed an INVISIBLE one.

At least that’s what the Huffington Post,, NY Times and everyone else says about women over 50.   Apparently, we have become such non-persons that young folks don’t even SEE us. So, here are some tips on how to make your self more VISIBLE:

  1. Wear bright colors. No, not just a colorful scarf. I’m talking, red shirt, green sunglasses and bold leggings.
  2. Talk to ANYONE younger than you. (At this point you have a large pool to draw from). This works particularly well at Starbucks. Find the youngest dodo head with earplugs in and say, “Hi. Whatcha listening to?” If it’s Radiohead, say something hip like, ‘They’re dope.’
  3. Have something current to say! Like, ‘Hey, did you know there is an ingredient in tree leaves that keep female mice from gaining weight—but it has NO effect whatsoever on male mice?
  4. Stand by the condiments. When someone sprinkles cinnamon on their latte, say, “Hey, did you know the FDA allows 22 rodent hairs and 400 insect parts in every 100 mg of that stuff you’re sprinkling on your latte?’
  5. Sit near a group of people talking and eavesdrop. Last week I learned what a “bot” is.
  6. At the grocery store, fill a cart with a few things, then find several yards of open space, get a running start and hop on. This will cause a few giggles.
  7. When you’re paying and the card reader says, “Is this amount correct?” Hit the “No” button. When the cashier freaks, calmly explain that in your day a loaf of bread, half-gallon of milk and carton of eggs could be had for $2, not $15.80.
  8. Head to the mall for a good, brisk walk. As you pass teenagers with too tight, or falling down jeans, begin singing, “My Favorite Things.” Make up your own lyrics like, “Girls in tight leggings with nose rings all jingling.”

Look. We have nothing left to prove! Pythagoras already did that. Be bold. Be brave. Be YOU! The best thing about aging is the FREEDOM to not care about the ‘impression’ you make. You’ve already made it!!


5 thoughts on “THE VISIBLE WOMAN!

  1. Yes, it is pretty darn interesting being invisible, and it is not just women. My retired judge friend has talked about the same phenomenon. Rosemary (74) last week and still loving life.


  2. 1. Be yourself and go all the way.
    2. Turn your attention from anything or anyone that doesn’t feel good.
    3. Respond to inquiries about your age with, “Which number will cause you to treat me with the most respect?”
    4. Laugh loudly and enjoy every lovely ounce on your body. Feel free to take up all the space you damned well want to.

    You never “earn” freedom and happiness; it was yours the second you were born. That never changed, but you may have to work your way back to it from what you’ve been trained.


  3. Why not throw popcorn at the pigeons in the park? LOL! Just kidding. To be considered invisible is quite a cruel treatment of women in their’50s and it never occured to me that would happen.


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