Commentary
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QUICK, WITH A SNAP, AND GONE
Today was horrible. An ice storm has laid waste the city and its’ streets. The bushes in my garden are a slumpy, frozen mess. It is so cold that the dog begins to limp in the frozen grass and must be carried to pee. I cannot get to the market or even to… Read more
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LIGHT MY FIRE
“Hey, you’re probably gonna get a ticket,” I said to the older gentleman sitting in the fire zone outside of Starbucks. “It’s okay,” he replied with a cursory glance at the sign. “My middle name is, ‘Fire’.” “Yeah, right,” I said, rolling my eyes. “My middle name is, “Ignatius,” he calmly explained, “which in Latin… Read more
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INCH BY INCH
For some stupid reason, when I turned 50, I decided that I should get an official physical. Not only had I lived half a century, I felt super-duper! The doctor poked everywhere, made me pee in a cup and sucked the marrow of my veins with waspy-looking hypodermics. The nurse measured and weighed me.… Read more
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THE FOUNTAIN OF YOUTH
I found the fountain of youth this week! Nope, not in Florida. Sorry Ponce de Leon. Nope. Not in my tube of Oil of Olay. I found it right here in this cute, little head of mine. It was there all along! Who knew? But that’s where it’s been the whole time, just waiting for… Read more
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GET ON MY LAWN!!!
Okay, so I called the cops—but hey it was late and dark and I was alone in the house when I spotted an old, beat up van with tinted windows parked well into the grass at the edge of my lawn. At first I thought it might be the girl who had contacted me… Read more
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TO 75 AND BEYOND!!!
If you have not yet read, “Why I hope to die at 75,” by Dr. Ezekiel Emanuel in this month’s Atlantic, don’t bother. He may be a distinguished scientist, head the Department of Medical Ethics at U Penn and be a primary architect of Obamacare, but frankly he’s not too swift. At first I thought… Read more
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Blind Man’s Bluff
Last week, a mobile unit with the sign, “Virtual Alzheimer’s,” was parked in front of my gym. They said that I would learn, “just what it’s like to have Alzheimer’s”. Heck, I had a few minutes. I removed my shoes so that they could slip inserts under my feet to simulate, “neuropathy.” Gloves were put… Read more
AGEFULLY AGING 