LOSING SLEEP OVER SLEEP?

Ever since I began wearing an OURA ring, I’ve become obsessed with my sleep. It’s called orthosomnia: I must get a perfect sleep number each night, or I’m devastated. If I wake up groggy but my score is 90, I bolt out of bed! If I wake feeling great but my score is 75, I droop. (I should have watched this video first.) Plus, sleep becomes more fragmented as you age. If I wake in the middle of the night, my intrusive thoughts squeeze like wasps through the vents of my thinking and keep me up.

Many of my friends smoke weed or eat gummies to fall asleep. Not me. I tried marijuana once in 1971. After eating an entire Sara Lee chocolate-fudge cake with Cheez Whiz and Kraft Marshmallow Cream on top, I was cured. Besides, I’d hate to swallow something that makes me loopy and not be able to unswallow it. Marijuana suppresses REM sleep, which is critical for memory consolidation and emotional regulation. If you get less than an hour and a half of REM each night, your anxiety and stress increase. Not a good look.

Also, as you age , you naturally forfeit good, quality sleep. OURA has shown me that I need to be in bed before 10. Otherwise, I’m a mess. No more late dinners because you need three hours to fully digest a meal. Going to bed on a full stomach interferes with deep sleep. Even genetics affect sleep, and this expert tells you why. Chronic disrupted sleep impairs cognitive function. As for ‘catch-up sleep?’ According to the experts, naps may make you feel better, but lack of quality sleep over time takes a toll.

There are a zillion sleep remedies out there. Most don’t work for me. So, here’s mine: If I want a good night’s sleep, I need a good day’s workout—every day. Before I turn in, I wash the dishes, clean the sink, fold the laundry, and put it away. I pay all bills, answer emails, then empty my junk and trash folders. I respond to every text and phone call and try to resolve any issue with a child, friend, or enemy. Then? I close my eyes and pretend I’m at the beach listening to the waves.