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SIGNS I’VE TAKEN TOO MANY PAIN MEDS
Recently, I had my 2nd knee replaced. Considering I’d done this once before, I thought I knew what to expect. Nope. The first night in the hospital, I’m given a dinner menu. I’m surprised to even have an appetite and attribute my complete lack of pain to a masterful anesthesiologist. Since I don’t have… Read more
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HAPPY NEW DAY!!
I have never made a New Year’s resolution. Not one. Not ever. It just feels stupid. Even as a kid I thought, ‘Why would I suddenly decide to do something for a whole year that I should probably be doing every day anyway?’ As the years passed and I watched countless friends give up on… Read more
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WARMING UP
Last week, my 94 year-old, friend left me this voicemail: “Helen, would you please write my obituary? And could you come over today?” Since I’ve never written one before, I looked up a few before heading to her house. Reading them made me wish I’d known the people themselves: “Walt was preceded in death by… Read more
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ARE YOU YEARS YOUNG….OR OLD??
I met this lovely gal at Trader Joe’s this morning. She was such a knockout in all blue that I asked her to, “Stand right where you are because I MUST take your picture!” She had just finished her 2 ½ mile daily walk, was grabbing some groceries then headed off to one of… Read more
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IT’S A NO BRAINER
Almost two-thirds of the 6 million American’s with Alzheimer’s are women. It was once thought that our longevity was the reason we developed Alzheimer’s more often than men. That belief is now being challenged by scientists who say that we are genetically more disposed to dementias because our brains have more “bridging regions.” Makes sense. We’re… Read more
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DEM BONES
This morning I called my orthopedist for an appointment. My new knee has suddenly begun to swell, the other knee is about to give out altogether and my right hip is making me limp. I’m crumbling as we speak. “I’d like to schedule an appointment to address a few issues,” I begin. “Well exactly… Read more
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CARRY ON!
“Hi! I’m Mr. Ed,” my seatmate says to me as we begin a four-hour flight to Phoenix. “Like the talking horse,” he continues. “Remember that TV show?” “Oh, Yes,” I assure him and I do. Now I’m a talker. I was constantly scolded for talking in class and my grandmother even nicknamed me, “chatterbox.”… Read more
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SUNNY SIDE UP!!!
Apparently I’m now at the age where no matter what doctor I go to when, there will always be something wrong. Last week I saw the eye doctor: “You have cataracts on both eyes but the right eye is much worse. They’re slow growing so you don’t have to operate yet.” Then I went for… Read more
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LOOK BEFORE YOU LANYARD
Lately, I’ve taken to wearing a lanyard around my neck, which holds my keys and a series of store tags from the places where I usually shop. Since I began this practice I have not lost my keys once! Until today, it has been a lifesaver. However, while checking out of Ace hardware this morning,… Read more
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SHOOTING FROM THE HIP
Yesterday I met a charming Millenial who just started working at the DMV! I was there to get that new ID card we all have to have by 2020. He said that he has been, “in training” and this was his very, first day, “out front with the public.” As I laid out my driver’s… Read more