Philosophy
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“We don’t stop playing because we get old. We get old because we stop playing.”–GB Shaw
When was the last time you played or did something spontaneous that wasn’t scripted? Maybe you hung upside down on the monkey bars, flew a kite or pulled a harmless prank on someone. Most adults do not play enough. When I ask clients when they last did something fun, many say, “I don’t remember.” But ‘all work… Read more
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MARK YOUR TERRITORY
Waiting for a restroom in New York City recently, this sign caught my attention. I recognized the man and woman, but thought the middle symbol was a sink with a mirror. Two 20-something women waiting behind me, began talking about the sign. So, I listened. “Oh my God, the woman’s top looks like an electrical outlet. Like you… Read more
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JUDGE THE COVER, MISS THE BOOK
Just when I think I’m seeing things clearly, I get thrown a curve ball. As I enter the produce section of Trader Joe’s, there is a man fondling the bananas. Yes, fondling. He eventually pulls off only one. I’m intrigued. His clothes are ill fitting and shabby and the seat of his trousers seems oil… Read more
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LIGHT IT UP
As a therapist, I’ve seen my share of suicides, psychotics, schizophrenics and other tortured souls: Men and women abusing each other or themselves. Couples with unrealistic expectations of their partners. Addicts unable to stop using drugs, eating food or watching porn and a populace that has seemingly lost its’ purpose. Recently, a teenager told me… Read more
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LOVE? OR SOMETHING LIKE IT?
This is my picture of unconditional love: a dog cruising down the highway with the window open, smiling and waving at everyone who passes. Love is arguably the only feeling that makes you, ‘able to leap tall buildings’ and get weak in the knees at the same time. But it’s ephemeral. Try to hold on too tightly… Read more
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HIGHER THAN A KITE
Lately, I’ve had a plethora of couples come for counseling. When it comes to frustration with a partner, age, apparently has no limitation. I have couples who’ve been married from two to 40-plus years. Interestingly, all of them have these three things in common: 1. They think they know each other really well, but definitely do… Read more
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“EVERYTHING CHANGES. EVEN STONE” –Monet
Each year, as I inch closer to death, the more I crave life. It’s as if I know there are only a certain number of steps left on my feet so I MUST keep moving them. I dance down the aisles of the supermarket, sing at full volume, breathe in every flower in my path, and revel… Read more
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WANT SUCCESS IN OLD AGE? START YOUNG
You’d think given all the time we have to prepare for old age we’d be ready for it when it comes. Nope. Sometimes on a perfectly lovely day as the sun splashes its’ golden beams upon me, I suddenly picture myself really old. My voice is weak and my hands unsteady. I am so wrinkled… Read more
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MEMORY: Real or Imagined?
We have 100 billion neurons and over 100 trillion synaptic connections in our brains. So why do we forget stuff? Because it’s not important to us. Yes, it’s that simple. I can still remember my grandmother’s phone number from 1970 (WHitney 5-6078) but couldn’t find my car keys yesterday. Granted, the processing speed of our neurons slows… Read more
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HELP I’M IN THE TUB AND I CAN’T GET OUT!
Look what I just bought myself for Christmas! Remember that commercial where an old lady was on the floor and said, “Help! I’ve fallen and I can’t get up?” It used to make me laugh. Not anymore. I finally took my first bath in this tiny tub since replacing both my knees. For reference, it… Read more