OLD BROAD’S THANKSGIVING PRAYER

Written by

Dear God, here and everywhere

Thank you for this meal we’ll share.

In this house that’s toasty warm

Although the roof leaks every storm.

I’m grateful that I still can eat

With all of my original teeth.

Although I bite most on the left

Because the right’s been chewed to death.

I’m grateful that I still can hear

Although it’s less in this one ear.

I strain to catch each grown kid’s tale…

So far, not one has gone to jail!

I’m thankful for their energy

How come they now have more than me?

The boy I wed is right here, too

My failing eyes still think he’s cute.

Guess what? I have the body parts

You gave me at the very start.

Although there’s been some wear and tear

And many less strands in my hair,

I’m grateful all my friends aren’t dead

And hope I have some years ahead

But should I grow both deaf and blind

I hope you’ll let me keep my mind.

So I can say this thankful grace

With friends & family ‘round the place.

Oh, one more thing before we sup,

Lord, thank you for my little pup!